[Music] The noon hour of madness and mayhem, the podcast.
Well, Victor, I was glad to finally meet the Victoria Rose this past Friday.
You did.
Yeah.
Wasn't she beautiful? [laughs]
Absolutely. No idea that it was you until I- I saw your hand do that little shaky thing.
Ah.
And then I went, "Oh, that's gotta be Victor."
[laughs]
'Cause Becca was unrecognizable too. She was, uh, Chip, right? Or Kip?
Chit.
Chit?
Chit.
Okay. That's-
Yeah
... that's gonna be tough to-
It's- it's a-
It's gonna be tough to say on the air without Jane puckering. [laughs]
Exactly. Make s- make sure you get the ch-
Ch- [laughs]
... in there real good.
Yeah.
Chit.
I'm afraid I went too close with them the first try.
[laughs] Yeah, it w- it was pretty funny. Uh, you know, Maddy came over, and both her and Becca. I mean, it took 'em like two hours or something to do that makeup.
[laughs]
I didn't realize how long it takes, uh, women to put makeup on.
I know Katie, back when she used to do mornings on Z103, she would say she would, uh, wake up at 4:00 A.M. to put, get ready for the day.
Gez.
And then get over here.
Yeah. Yeah. You know, poor ladies. You know, you gotta put all this work in. Um, you know, props to you for being able to, uh, tolerate doing that. I mean-
Us dudes, we just hire the woman to do it. [laughs]
[laughs] That's right. But it- it was a lot of fun. I just laughed all night 'cause, you know, uh, Becca looked so in- insane that, uh, we were just taking pictures and just laughing.
Yeah. No, it was great to get a picture with you-
So
... uh, you and, uh, I mean, Victoria, and, uh-
Yes
... and, uh, Pedro is somebody called. [laughs] Becca looked-
[laughs]
She looked like Pedro from Napoleon Dynamite, 100%.
Yeah, at one point though, her wig got messed up, so then she changed the hair, and then she looked like Pedro.
Oh.
So yeah, it was, uh, it was pretty funny.
I'm adding that to the Christmas card right away.
Yeah? [laughs]
Yeah. Yeah.
Very nice.
With a picture of all four of us right by the entrance. Now, it was a fun show and all of that, but I was afraid that they were gonna, like, like, all of a sudden go on to me. You know, like, the very first performer-
Oh. Yeah
... dressed up as, uh, Freddy Krueger and started touching, uh, Aubrey's friend, Connor?
Yeah.
There was that whole thing. And I was just wanting to watch it in the back. I didn't wanna be involved. And of course, Jeff from down the hall, "I would love to see Peaches get touched by one of the dancers."
[laughs]
It's like, "Come on, dude. I'm just trying to- I'm just trying to watch the show."
Uh, that's funny. Yeah, it was- it was pretty funny, pretty entertaining. Uh, I- I had a good time. I had a good time. And then, uh, Saturday night, uh, we went and saw a little bit of a Stiff Richard play at, uh, the Roadhouse.
Did you show up as Victoria there as well?
No, when we got home, we were gonna get on like Omegle, still wearing our costumes after the show, but we were so tired when we got home that we just crashed out.
I thought Omegle was shut down.
I- I don't think so. I think it's still going.
'Cause there was that whole thing from back in the day, Omegle's shutting down.
Huh.
And all those content creators that specialize on Omegle videos were just screwed.
Yeah, no, we got on there one night when we were bored just to try it, 'cause I'd never been on there. It was pretty funny. Um, but yeah, we figured it'd be hilarious to be in our costumes.
You see a lot of dudes just doing their thing? [laughs]
Uh, uh, well, thankfully I didn't see anything, but there were a few that I was like-
[laughs] Oh, yeah
... "Hey, what are you doing, dude?" [laughs]
[laughs] You pointed at them? [laughs] So I'm glad that the whole show went well. Seemed that there was a- a good turnout.
Yeah, yeah. It w- it wasn't too bad. And yeah, we just got home and I was like, "All right, I gotta get this makeup off." And, uh, I don't know how many makeup r- remover wipes I had to use. [laughs] But I was like, "Man, these girls gotta go through a lot of crap."
Right.
You know?
Yeah.
So-
I feel bad for you because you've been getting roasted by everyone here in the building.
Oh, yeah. Well-
With the- with the no goatee. I almost wanted to do a video on our- [laughs] our socials to show what Victor looks like without the whole goatee that he's had for 15 years.
Well, I took a horrific picture, like right after I shaved my beard off, and I sent it to my kids and they were just disgusted. They were, you know, they... Like, the last time I shaved it off they were so little they didn't remember, so they're like, "I don't think I've ever seen you without a beard. Please make it come back." [laughs]
[laughs] Which is sad 'cause it's like, that's your face.
I know. It is my- but I felt the same way. [laughs] You know, if I- I- I've been avoiding mirrors, you know? But the- there's some stubble, it should be back in no time. So-
Oh, good. Good.
Yeah.
Glad to hear it. W-
So-
And, uh, yeah, the Victoria Rose can be found on our socials as well, KBAR 101 FM, if people wanted to see her.
Yeah, and I posted a bunch on my personal Facebook page, Victor Wilt, so-
Oh, there we go
... you can go check 'em out there if you wanna see how- how pretty I look. [Music]
Victor, you're familiar with Kristen Bell, right?
Yeah.
The actress?
Yeah.
She's married to Dax Shepard.
Yes.
They haven't really been in anything recently, have they?
Not that I recall. Um, 'cause she was in a lot of stuff and so was he for a while there. But yeah, no, I- I don't know.
W- me and her, me and Aubrey watched, uh, Movie 43 that Kristen-
Oh, yeah
... Bell is in.
Yeah.
And she, of course, Aubrey did not like the movie at all.
No? [laughs]
She- she was just mind blown by how crass they were during that whole thing.
That's a pretty- pretty vile movie.
It's great.
Uh, you need to show her the Tom Green movie, the, you know, Freddy?
Oh, mm-hmm.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Show her that one. Holy cow.
Yeah, it was so stupid, yesterday we were, um, sitting there and she's like, "Choose a movie to watch." At our- at her parent's place, right?
Mm-hmm.
Her mom's in the chair, uh, and her mom was all like, "Oh, don't turn something on that is gonna scare me."
[laughs]
And I was gonna turn on the- the- the latest Final Destination.
It's not scary.
And so she was like, "Oh, don't turn that on." So I'm like, "Forget it," and I just chucked the remote on the couch.
[laughs]
I'm like, "You guys choose some stupid movie then." And they chose Premonition with Sandra Bullock.
Oh.
And so I did that thing where I'm just like, "I'm not watching this T- I'm not watching this crap." I just looked down the whole time.
Oh, geez-
Did that thing.
... I'm gonna stare at my phone.
Right. No, because A- Aubrey was scrapbooking. I'm not gonna help you with the scrapbook, I'm not gonna watch some stupid movie with Sandra Bullock. "Oh, my husband died, uh."
[laughs]
You know, that type of thing. And- and then the mom had ended up falling asleep, so then I turned that movie quickly off and turned on It Chapter Two.
Nice.
Yeah.
Nice. I- it- that- that's a fun movie. I haven't watched it in a while.
Three hours long and, uh ...Yeah. It's, it's, it's, still holds up.
Have you watched fi- the new Final Destination yet?
No, I haven't.
Oh, it's really good.
I haven't had any time to watch any movies, 'cause I'm rushing places, doing things. And I, I just wanna, like, reserve maybe two hours out of my night now just to watch a horror movie, 'cause I haven't been able to watch, like, The Descent and all these different ones that I wanna see.
I know. I, I haven't watched any movies either, 'cause I've just been going nonstop. So-
The Long Walk finally coming to Prime Video, um, I think this week.
Yeah?
Yeah.
All right. Cool. Cool. Well, that's exciting news. I know I have a huge list of movies I wanna watch. And, uh, you know, Becca's been working nights, so like last week, I was gonna watch, uh, Eddington, the movie I fell asleep at the theater during.
Right.
And so I sat in my recliner and was like, "All right, I'm gonna have some food." And then I just passed out. [laughs]
Again. Again.
[laughs]
Well, the reason why I brought up Kristen Bell is because she posted on Instagram [laughs] celebrating her anniversary, her 12th wedding anniversary to Dax Shepard, right?
Mm-hmm.
She now limited the comments because she said, "Happy 12th wedding anniversary to the man who once said to me, 'I would never kill you.'"
[laughs]
"A lot of men have killed their wives at a certain point, even though I'm heavily incentivized-"
Incenti- incentivized?
"... incentivized to killed you, I never would."
[laughs] Some people didn't like that, huh?
No.
[laughs] I mean, obviously he was joking.
Uh, yeah, definitely.
You know?
But, you know, there's, "That's not funny. That's offensive."
Oh, geez.
My mom worked three job... No, I'm just kidding. [laughs] Random, it's something, it's like terrible post.
Yeah, um-
[laughs]
... the, um, people, people get so butt hurt about just everything now.
Right.
You know? Like, I, I had a little blocked user action occur to me on Facebook. [laughs]
I saw that and I thought that was hilarious. I don't know who that guy was, but I thought the dude that blocked you was a complete and utter loser.
Well, he-
After looking at his Facebook profile, I was like, "Dude-"
Did you see, uh, the East Idaho News thing where it was like, "Look at me exposing the East Idaho News liberal agenda."
Right. East Idaho News is not a liberal company.
No, they're like the most neutral news company that I know.
Right.
Like, they just post the news. They don't even put any opinion in.
That crowd is like the metal elitist crowd. Like, no, you, you like the popular band.
[laughs]
You, you know, they're like, for like, for, you know, the extreme far people.
Yeah.
It's like, "Oh, you're, you're worse than I am. You believe [laughs] in s- this slight thing."
Yeah.
"Let me just yell at you online."
And-
That's what it feels like the metal elitist comparison.
Yeah, so I just kept go... C- 'cause he was commenting on East Idaho News posts all day Saturday, and so I kept telling him to stop whining. [laughs]
Right. [laughs]
I was like, "Just stop whining." I was like, "They've given you more coverage than people who are respected in our community [laughs] and deserve it. Shut up." And then I finally went over to his page where he had that big... all the screenshots of East Idaho News, and I said the same thing, like, "Stop whining. Be a man."
[laughs]
And then he blocked me. [laughs]
There was one person in particular that I meant to tell you. Um, I sent him a friend request, just to be nice.
Okay.
And he decided to decline it and just make me a follower on his Facebook.
Okay.
So then I said, "Screw you," and just blocked him entirely.
[laughs] You'll have to tell me off-air who it is.
Oh, you're the host of a podcast, you know.
The host of a pod... Oh. Hmm. I might-
I thought he was, uh, nice when we talked at the, uh, Fair Food taste testing.
Yeah.
So I'm like, "I'll be cool, I'll be neutral. I don't have any bad blood with you." And then sure enough, just doesn't accept my friend request. So I said, "Enough with you and your stupid product. Block." [laughs]
Yeah, I... He still has me blocked on social media and, uh, you know-
Right
... I thought we're fine, but whate- whatever.
I was just trying to be friends.
I know s-
I don't care about, like, previous drama, but when you make me a follower of your page and you decline my friend request, get out of here.
[laughs]
Victor, you know that movie? What, what, what's it called, with Emma Stone? They had some weird title to it. Begonia?
Oh, yeah. We're... Weren't we talking about that recently 'cause we-
Yeah
... couldn't read the movie poster?
It's, it's not the best logo for any movie whatsoever.
No.
And by that I mean it's probably one of the worst ones I've ever seen, only because, like, you can't read it.
Yeah.
I saw the trailer pop up when me, me and the crew saw The Conjuring Last Rites.
Mm-hmm.
And I was like, "What on earth is that title?"
Yeah, it looks like a weird movie.
Everyone's calling it the bald Emma Stone movie.
Okay.
And then I saw this California theater hosting a free screening of Begonia for bald attendees only.
Yeah. All right.
Yeah. Where's my, where's my, uh, air horn? Oh, shoot. I forgot. There it-
Yeah,
That's what we need
... there it is. There it is.
Well, we need to do that here, 'cause I'm always down to go see a free movie.
I-
I can sleep in the theater. [laughs]
If you're not bald but want to attend, the cinema will have a barber on site to shave your head.
So you could go get a haircut, too, at the same time.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Mm-hmm.
Yeah, and it's better than having to do it yourself. That's what I do.
If you're one of those balding dudes, just do it for that one time, and then if you don't like it, just say, "Yeah, it was for a movie." Then grow it right back.
Yeah, that's... a free haircut and a free movie. That's a good deal.
I can't imagine being a, a girl wanting to do this type of thing.
Yeah, I, I'm sure it's just gonna be a crowd full of dudes.
Right.
You know, there, there might be a handful of girls that would do it, but... Yeah, why, why don't, why don't they do that here? Well, we- we- we'll just be a, a gathering of the bald dudes.
I mean, we could try to give away tickets to that movie.
We could.
And then just have our own barber chair right outside and just [laughs] shave everybody's head.
Uh-huh.
I mean, you don't need a license to shave somebody's head. You can just [buzzing sounds] and that's it.
Yeah, I don't think you'd n- I bet our company lawyers would be worried about us having a razor, even if it's electric and has the, you know, safety thing on it. I, I bet they'd still... 'Cause what if we nick somebody's head? You know-
Yeah, what if they move and-
Yeah
Yeah.
And then you gotta touch their heads, too.
I mean, you're the germaphobe. I don't care.
I, I-
Oh, you put on latex gloves, you're fine.
I, I guess if I wore gloves.
But what if you have that one person that has lice and just-
No! [laughs]
... d- goes all over you? [laughs]
Yeah, and you know, like, sometimes people are smelly. Like, I, I don't wanna be that close to people.
Oh, there's a particular person that I wanna talk about with you off the air that smells like ham all the time.
Ham?
Yeah. Yeah.
Okay, you'll have to tell me off-air.
I- it's super, super, uh, pungent. Is that the word?
A super pungent ham smell.
Yeah, it's n- It's like when you reach a certain weight as a dude and you grow out a beard.
... you just smell like ham?
You start smelling like ham. You have that fat guy smell, you know?
Yeah. I know you've talked about that before. I hope I don't have that going on.
No, my friend Heavy T smells like it.
Smells like ham?
And then there's one other person, relatively close to us-
Okay
... that smells like ham all the time.
All right. Maybe, maybe he eats a lot of ham?
Maybe.
Ham's not bad, you know?
[laughs]
It's pretty good.
It's, I, I just... It just smells like ham to me, but it has, like, that stink to it.
Hmm. Stinky ham.
It has, like, that, uh, metalhead who hasn't showered in weeks type of smell.
Ah. Yeah, if you're gonna go to a show, people, please shower.
Right.
Put on some deodorant. It's okay.
I was making some Halloween-
It's okay
... sweepers saying, "Hey, please wear deodorant with your costumes." [laughs]
Yes.
There's that.
Yeah.
Well, yeah, I'll tell you that person of the air. But I do also wanna talk about a stupid, uh, giveaway that one radio station is doing-
Okay
... um, for the next break.
Okay. Let's dive in here in just a few.
All right. Wrapping up the Noon Hour of Madness and Mayhem. Victor, you know the Woody Show by now.
Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. They're doing a stupid giveaway, huh?
They're doing this extreme Dubai giveaway. I don't know how they got away with this type of thing, how they were able to pull this off. Uh, I think Woody went to the iHeart Radio executives-
Mm-hmm
... and was like, "Hey, we need to do, uh, three tickets, first class to Dubai for the weekend." And they're gonna have Woody and Menace fly first class with a listener to Dubai, it's a 16-hour flight, to then spend a few hours in Dubai and then leave again. And, and with-
That sounds horrible
... within, within a weekend. So you're spending 32 hours at 36,000 feet in an airplane. I don't care if it's first class, no class, whatever.
That's awful.
Being on a plane for that long, I'm...
Ugh.
I'm now getting to that... For some reason, I'm now developing a fear of being afraid of flying.
Yeah, you told me that.
'Cause of the turbulence and such-
Mm-hmm
... I, I grip onto the seat.
Yeah, imagine going over the ocean-
Right
... for [laughs] like 10 hours.
Then that's... Well, the thing is with the-
[laughs]
... with John Wayne Airport, you fly, and then you go into the ocean for a brief bit, and then you make a U-turn, and then you go towards Idaho Falls.
Oh, yeah. You t-
Every single flight.
You told me that. Yeah.
Yeah. Mm-hmm.
Dude, flying over the ocean, 'cause I've done it too, it's, it's kinda scary.
You look down, you're like, "There's hundreds of feet of water below me. And there could be, you know, some beluga whale with its mouth open waiting to eat me."
Yeah. A- and if you crash, there's nowhere to go.
Right. [laughs]
You know, even, even if, like, you survive the impact, you can't go down the slide-
No, but there's-
... into the water.
Uh, aren't there inflatable rafts on, on board?
I would assume.
How are they gonna fit every single passenger on that thing?
Yeah, it's like the Titanic.
I- I have a bad, bad time with, uh, kayaks.
[laughs] That's true.
So there, there's that. I'm gonna f- fall out, f- start swimming, and, you know, start treading water. "Help, help!" [laughs]
Dude, if, you know-
Everyone has to lift my fat butt out of the water.
[laughs] I, I would assume, for whatever reason, Woody wanted to go to Dubai.
Well, the thing is, he's not even leaving the airport. He, he's interested in flying. He's trying to get his pilot's license.
Okay.
So he's trying to, uh, just see the plane, see what first class is like. But the ticket itself is $25,000 per person.
Holy cow.
And they somehow got away with spending that much money through the company's money.
Man. I mean, uh, 'cause I'd love to do a giveaway where... Okay, where do we wanna go, Peaches? And we'll take a listener, sure.
Oh, sure. The Aftershock.
[laughs] Yeah, exactly. Fly us to Sacramento. Somewhere in the US.
Yeah, but then we have to spend a weekend with the listener, and they have to hear our, hear our CPAPs and stuff, and like... [laughs]
No, I'd hope you'd get your own room.
Ah, yeah, sure.
You know, I m- I would imagine Woody, he-
But I can't imagine with the company's budget here, we'd probably get, uh, "Hey, you're on your own."
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
For the love of the game.
We'll, we'll get you the cheapest flight possible to, I guess, Vegas, and a room at Circus Circus.
Yeah, you know how, like, radio treats you. Like, "It's a labor of love."
Yeah. [laughs]
Uh, th- that's, that's the way we treat it with, uh... You know. [laughs] You, you get to go, but good luck with everything else.
Wow. Y- And you would think with, uh, you know, everything going on with Woody right now, the company is probably already spending a lot of money on him. You wouldn't think they'd be shipping him off to Dubai. Maybe it's a conspiracy [laughs] and they're gonna-
Well, he seems-
... crash the plane.
Oh, geez.
[laughs] Yeah. You never know.
But he seems rather, like, uh, happy right now. I just watched a video-
Really?
... of him on the show. He doesn't seem all that, uh, uh, kind of... What's it called? Obviously concerned.
All right. Well, he's probably, you know, hamming it up and pretending he's not concerned 'cause-
I would be.
It's-
If I was getting in some legal trouble with some former cohost, I would easily
back out of the show for a couple of weeks until that whole thing's over.
Yeah. I've, I... 'Cause, like, days... Like today, I came in, I was so tired 'cause I woke up at 2:30, couldn't get back to sleep. Uh, you know, just woke up with anxiety, couldn't get back to sleep. So I was exhausted, but I still, even though I complained a little bit about being really tired, I, I tried to make the show fun, you know? I didn't come across as like, "Oh, I don't wanna be here. Oh, this sucks. Ah." Which-
You do that some days.
I, I do that some days, you're right. Yeah. I'm a liar.
I can tell when, uh, w- when you're in a bad mood too when... 'Cause you can say, "What's up, Peaches?"
" What's up?"
Versus a, "Hey, Peaches, how's it going?"
[laughs] Uh, I do my best to fake it, but, you know, sometimes it, it gets out there, so... Woo- Well, Woody's probably smiling. He's getting a free trip to Dubai.
Well, he's not even gonna be going out anywhere. Like, the, the, they have no time to do so. Menace, on the show, he's gonna go out into the city for a brief bit, take some pictures of what, what he wants to show the listener, and then he's coming back. Woody's not even leaving the airport. He's just staying in the Emirates Lounge. Ooh. You know?
Yeah. Hmm. And, and I hear Dubai's not very good. Like, it... Y- you know when we look at those overrated destinations lists on Reddit?
Yeah.
Dubai's always in there, you know? But I guess Vegas is always in there too.
I mean, Vegas is like... Dubai is Vegas tenfold-
Yeah
... from what I've seen.
Yeah.
Uh, you could go over there. Aren't... Don't the, uh, Tate brothers live in Dubai?
I don't know where they're at. They, they've kinda dropped off the face of the planet.
Yeah.
Haven't seen anything about those guys in quite a while. It must be getting gloomy outside. It suddenly got dark in here. Uh.
[laughs] Fun stuff.
Storms are brewing.
Oh yeah, I did see a low of 28 next week.
Ooh.
I hope everyone's ready for that.
Yeah, I... When I, uh, you know, ran home at lunch, it was cold outside [laughs] today.
I killed the last of my bu- uh, last of the bugs around my place. Around my door, there was a ton of spiders. I think there was one mom spider with all of her kids. I was like-
[laughs]
... "Goodbye, family."
[laughs]
Sss, got it with the, got it with the s- the spray.
[laughs]
Started killing all the beetles outside.
[laughs]
The old lady who lives next door is probably like, "What's going on?" And, "Die, die, die!"
[laughs] The Noon Hour of Madness and Mayhem is a production of Riverbend Media Group. For more information or to contact the show, visit riverbendmediagroup.com.