[upbeat music] The Noon Hour of Madness and Mayhem, the podcast
Friday edition of the Noon Hour of Madness and Mayhem. What's up, Peaches?
That's right.
Yeah.
Woo!
Yeah, I'm, uh, so excited. So excited-
[laughs]
... for the weekend. Anyway,
what's on your mind, Peaches?
When is a concert too big?
Hmm.
Jo Koy and Gabriel Iglesias, Fluffy, they both did their own show at SoFi Stadium where the Chargers play.
Okay. To see a comic-
I- imagine sitting in the far back.
[laughs] That's terrible
And you have to have binoculars to see.
Okay.
Why, why would you even show up to the show?
Okay. I went to WrestleMania at, uh, was it called Safeco Field? It w-
See, I went to WrestleMania 21 at Staples Center, and I was in the far back myself.
Yeah, and you can't see anything.
No.
You-
You couldn't understand anything they said. They were so, uh, over-modulated on the microphones.
Yeah, I-
It must have been my hearing back then, 'cause it was just like this. You couldn't understand a word they're saying.
I couldn't hear anything from the wrestlers. You know, you don't get to hear the commentary, and the commentary adds a lot to watching pro wrestling. You know, they got those guys that are funny. They're all amped up, getting nuts.
Good old JR.
That's right. When you don't have that, I don't know, it, it, it takes a lot away from it. Can you hear that if you're closer to the ring?
If you're ... Yeah, if you're by the tables, absolutely.
Well, if you're right by their tables. But they, they don't amplify it in the room at all?
I don't think so, no, no.
I, I thought that was so weird, 'cause it, it just seemed like it took a ton away from the event. Um,
I mean, stadium shows are not that great. I'm, I'm not a big fan of stadium shows.
Ah, I have to say-
They're too big
... amphitheaters are worse.
Worse than stadiums?
Uh, stadiums like ... Oh, I mean, outdoor stadiums, definitely. Those are the worst ones.
Yeah.
Like the Rose Bowl, hated that.
Yeah.
Hated every second of that when I saw Metallica, Avenged Sevenfold, and Gojira there.
I guess if you-
I was in the very far back, the last row
... an indoor stadium, they can probably sound treat it better to where, you know, it, the event would sound good, but-
But then you're watching it on the big screen TV.
Yeah.
Is that even worth it?
Yeah. I, I don't know, man. I'm, I'm going with you.
'Cause I wanna stare at the person. I mean, a- as creepy as that sounds, I wanna stare at the artist.
Yeah.
You know?
Like USANA's too big, you know? Or the Utah First Credit Union Amphitheatre.
Well, I'm trying to g-
If you're back on the grass, it sucks
... I'm trying to get tickets for, uh, Post Malone and Jelly Roll at Rice-Eccles Stadium.
Mm-hmm.
Which is huge.
Yeah, yeah, massive. Yeah, that, that sounds too big. I don't know. I ... My favorite size of a show is probably, like, The Complex.
Yeah, I know. I'm kind of scared, 'cause the Revolution Concert house, it's a little small. I wanna get away from the pit.
Oh.
I, I mean, that's, that's-
Yeah, you're going to Slaughter to Prevail in White Chapel. [laughs]
And Attila.
[laughs] Well, Revolution, at least it's not Knitting Factory small, you know? Which-
Or Shredder.
Or Shredder small. [laughs]
[laughs]
Yeah. You know, if a pit breaks out in the Shredder, you're in the pit. Uh-
The Urban Lounge was awesome when I saw, uh, Gideon, Left To Suffer, Fox Lake, and No Cure.
I like small venues. I-
That place is cool. I, I do like a nice little bar show sometimes.
I think I definitely prefer smaller shows over amphitheaters, um, arenas. You know, it ... I don't know, unless you're in the right spot, you know, it can suck if you're way up in the back. Like that Nine Inch Nails show, I can't imagine being that far away from everything.
See, for me, it wasn't worth it to go to something like that, and you just can't see.
Yeah. That's why I overpaid to be on the floor.
Yeah, and I wasn't gonna pay a dime to that guy that's like, "Oh, I'm gonna give those guys radio tickets."
[laughs] Yeah. That's sadly becoming a little more common. [laughs] So maybe-
Don't give that local podcaster fuel.
[laughs]
All right?
"Oh, you mean you want them to give free tickets?" [laughs]
And if CBS is getting rid of their radio division, take this.
The ... Oh, I, I know. You know that's coming even though nobody cares about CBS News except people in radio. You know? [laughs] It's like it was crap they used to fill the top of the hour. That's all it wa- all it was. Good, get rid of it. That's old radio crap we don't need.
Get-
Sorry to those employees
... get rid of all the giant radio con- conglomer- conglomerates and, you know, have independent stations around the country.
Exactly. That ... Let's make radio great again, Peaches.
Get your hat out. I'll get my best suit jacket.
It's MRGA.
[laughs]
MRGA, Make Radio-
[laughs] MR- MR-
... MRGA.
[laughs]
[laughs] [upbeat music] Hey, Peaches.
What?
How much would you have to be paid to eat ice cream-
Oh, no
... that was, uh, filled [laughs] with metal fragments and fingernails? [laughs]
As long as I have enough to pay the medical bills, I'll be fine.
Well, a woman in Florida got paid 14 million bucks for it.
Good.
Dude, I would totally eat ice cream filled with metal shards [laughs] for 14 million.
I eat my own fingernails.
[laughs]
Why not eat somebody else's?
That's right. [laughs]
What kind of metal shards we talking about here?
I don't know. That's what ... She says there was, like, a, a, a nail in it.
Was there ... Well, was it rusty and tetanus?
No. [laughs] Oh, yeah.
[laughs]
Yeah, she's, like, eating the ice cream, takes a big bite, and then something gets stuck in her throat, so she, uh-
Somebody did that to her. That wasn't from the, the, the ice cream production plant.
[laughs]
This, this, this ... Somebody, somebody planted that in there.
Oh, absolutely.
There's no, "How did that get in there?"
[laughs] I w- I don't know where these metal shards came from.
I bet some dude was, like, cutting off his fingernails for the longest time, going, "I'm gonna get this lady dead."
Ooh.
Yeah.
Yeah, it did mess her up pretty good.
Yeah.
She got, uh, portal vein thrombosis-
Oh
... and significant internal bleeding. Uh, also, multiple blood clots, and, uh, she can no longer have children, so ...
[laughs]
[laughs] Um, I'd say, uh, that she deserved the 14 million. Oh, and she's like, "That was my goal and my dream to have more kids." This story's getting sad as we go.
Oh, she already has kids. Okay, so she's, she's, she's g-
Well, she had a kid.
Oh, no.
And it, it passed away.
Oh.
So, you know, her dream was to have a, have some more kids.
I think I can't make jokes about this.
No, you can't joke about it.
Why are you bringing this up then? That was-
I didn't see that part.
[laughs]
I just saw woman eats metal shards and was like, "That's Noon Hour content."
This is supposed to be funny. No, this is just awful.
I ... I'm sure we could make jokesBut no.
Okay, you know what? Rad Chad.
[laughs] Hey.
Bring, bring him out.
[laughs]
Let's hear that twist.
Rad Chad.
Come on.
[laughs] No, no. [upbeat music] All right, Peaches and I were talking about things he would do for money on our previous break.
Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
[laughs] No, not, not, not like that. Well, hey, Peaches. No. Um, how much w- [laughs] would it cost for you to continue sitting in that chair? [laughs]
Uh.
[laughs] That's about to break.
It's leaning forward. It's not, like, about to just launch me, but ...
Yeah, but you, you'd hit the ground pretty good. You know,
five bucks? And you-
Five bucks?
... do the rest of the show sitting in the chair. [laughs] What were some of the other ones you threw out? How much would you-
Uh, [laughs]
... you know, need to be paid to, uh, lay down on a bunch of, uh, you know, thumbtacks?
How much would, uh, would you get paid if you were to get suplexed by, uh, Brock Lesnar?
Oh.
Oh, how, how much would the hospital bills be?
Uh, de- depends on how you land.
I ... That's true, 'cause I bet I wouldn't land it right.
I think Brock Lesnar would, like, take care of you.
You think so?
I think, I, I, I think ... Well, he's known to be a gentle, like, grappler when it comes to fake wrestling.
Yeah.
As long as you don't make him mad.
Okay. Um,
I, I'd go probably 50 Gs.
50 Gs?
[laughs] 'Cause it'll be embarrassing. [laughs]
I, I would say it'd be an honor.
It would be an honor, so you'd do it for free.
Dude, I would get Stone Cold Stunned if I could.
[laughs]
[laughs]
Let's ... Uh, hit 'em up. Bring Poncho.
[laughs] What?
That's a solid cat right there. [laughs]
[laughs] I love that he cuts a promo on that, on that cat sometimes.
Dude, the, the videos of him and his cats crack me up so much. He's bu- what, on a farm in, like, Texas or something?
Yeah, in the middle of nowhere.
Yeah.
Broken Skull Ranch is what he calls it.
[laughs] Just hanging out with my cats.
Yeah.
A solid cat.
What?
[laughs] He's very wholesome on social media.
He chucks, chucks a beer at Poncho.
[laughs]
Drink up. What?
[laughs] [upbeat music] This is the Noon Hour of Madness and Mayhem. I am Victor.
I'm doing the final part of this Noon Hour standing up. I am Peaches, and-
Peaches won't sit in that chair
... I follow this, uh, i- Instagram page called OVHS Alumni. It's my old high school's alumni page.
Okay.
It has about 500 followers.
Okay.
And they just started doing this thing called the Alumni Spotlight.
Oh.
So they're like, "Hey, i- i- if, uh, you wanna be the star of our next OV Alumni Spotlight, send us a DM with your story so we can show off your post-grad adventure."
Dude, you gotta do it, Peaches.
I did.
All right.
I, I sent them a DM, the full thing, sent them pictures, so next week I'll be a part of that.
I wonder if, uh, Pocatello High School has any kind of, uh, alumni pages.
It ... The, the narcissist in me is genuinely annoyed that John Camucci, my, my, my good friend who lives-
Mm-hmm
... in, uh, LA does morn- He's the co-host-
Mm-hmm
... of Valentine in the Morning.
Yes.
He's just the co-host. He's just the guy that's, like, the un-appeal of the show, right?
Yeah. Yeah.
I, I have my own show out here-
[laughs]
... and Cal State Fullerton doesn't make a whole article about me.
What a bunch of bullcrap.
And they also don't, uh, put out billboards or anything of that sort. I graduated from Cal State Fullerton.
Yeah. What the heck, man? Speaking of that, what's up, uh, Pocatello?
It says, "It takes a Titan," and then it shows little John Camucci.
[laughs]
Wouldn't it be better-
[laughs] It would be much better
... if it takes a Titan-
And you have a, an actual Titan
... and they have eleph- they have an elephant-sized bald guy on the billboard, "I'm in radio."
[laughs] Well, they better put you on the high school page. That'd be a bunch of crap if they didn't.
Well, they said they would.
Oh, oh, g- all right.
They, they, they said, they, they said they would, so.
Cool.
My goal is to make it right there in the Notable Alumni section alongside Samoa Joe and Jason Lee. You know Jason Lee from My Name is Earl?
Yeah.
[laughs] Alvin and the Chipmunks?
Yeah.
He went to my high school years ago. [laughs]
[laughs] All right. That ... I, as I was looking for Pocatello High School alumni stuff, um, pulled up an article from last April in, uh, the Idaho State Journal, and it says, "History and Hall of Fame display project underway at Pocatello High School."
But you don't have your diploma.
They-
They could use that against you.
They have it there, I think.
I know, but they could, they could definitely use that against you.
[clears throat]
If I were to pay-
We're, we're not gonna put you in the Hall of Fame unless you pla- pay those parking tickets. [laughs]
If I were to pay you, like, 200 to $300 for Brock Lesnar to suplex you for you to get that diploma.
[laughs]
[laughs] I, I don't remember what amount I owe. I'm overdue to call them again and see if they still have it and find out how much my fees are.
Do you think it gains interest?
I don't think so. Um, but I do seem to recall they were like, "Yeah, there were some textbooks you didn't turn in." And I'm like, "What, what are you talking about? I don't remember that."
When I was transferring high schools, they tried accusing me of, uh, holding the copy of To Kill a Mockingbird or something like that. It's like, what am I gonna keep that book for?
Yeah.
It's a great story, but I'm not gonna keep a used high school copy.
Well, and but mine was, like, s- you know, a math textbook or something.
All the inappropriate words were highlighted in that copy.
[laughs]
I'm not gonna keep that.
[laughs]
[laughs] Yeah. Let's see here. I don't ... Uh, okay, it doesn't look like they're, like, hanging up pictures going like, "The greatest student of all time [laughs] at Pocatello High School."
Well, what's the, what, what's the, uh, the mascot for Pocatello High School?
Oh, what is it now?
Oh, you don't know?
It's ... Well, they changed it. It's, it's the Thunder, but I think it's like, uh, kind of a buffalo, bison looking, uh-
[laughs] It takes some bison-
'Cause it used to-
... shows Victor up there
... it used to be the, the Indians. That's when I went there.
[laughs]
It was the Indians.
It takes an Indian. [laughs]
No. Geez, no. Not getting canceled for Poky High.
You, you in that costume. [laughs]
No. [laughs]
Right there on the wall. [laughs]
Dude, when I went to Poky High, we had the ... What did they call them? The Indianettes, I think, and they would dance around in full headdress and everything. This wasn't very long ago, Peaches.
Oh my-
This was, you know, late '90s.
Dickinson High School in North Dakota, if you look up their mascot, I can't say the word. It's a little person.
Oh, yeah, I've, I've seen that.
[laughs]
And they still haven't changed it?
They, they changed it to where he's now a, a leprechaun, so they have the same-
That's worse. [laughs]
[laughs] They have the same guy-
Oh
... but he's dyed g- red with green clothes. [laughs]
Dude, that is messed, that is messed up, man.
And people keep tagging Peter Dinklage on those posts.
Oh, dude, that's so messed up. [laughs]
[laughs]
Some people need to stop trying to hang on to traditions.
Well, I mean, hey, we got a local market right here in-
Uh, we do
... right here in the area.
We do. It has an interesting name.
But-
And what, what was the comic? Brad Williams?
Brad W- Brad Williams, yeah. He liked it.
He took a picture in front of it. Yeah.
Took a whole video, said, "Hey, this is where I get my stuff for free."
[laughs] [upbeat music]
The Noon Hour of Madness and Mayhem is a production of Riverbend Media Group. For more information or to contact the show, visit riverbendmediagroup.com.
[upbeat music]